Online dating is not all fun and games and there are a lot of things that a person has to know about online dating before one gets into the intricacies of it.
Online dating may seem to be the simplest thing in the world but it is not. It should be viewed in all earnestness or things could go haywire. Every game has its rules and unless you know all the rules you just can’t become a good player and eventually a winner.
Tastes Differ
There are so many kinds of people around. Just look around you, how many people you know look the same?
Sizes, builds, shapes, features… they are all so different.
And that is just about the external appearances. And when it comes to character, it becomes a very different story altogether. Take a trip down memory lane, go back to your classrooms and take a look around.
A classroom is one place where we get to interact with a lot of different people on a very close basis. We get to rub shoulders and corners with very different people and we get to know them on a one to one basis. So how many of your classmates did you genuinely like?
I don’t mean like them as classmates but as people. Was it easy to get along with all of them? That is why we often end up with best friends or clichés in classrooms.
We do not and do not have to like every body. The tastes and interests of one person might match with ours while the tastes and interests of another person may be at complete loggerheads with ours.
So when it comes to dating, it is very much the same story. But over here there are some strings attached. Unlike in a classroom contact, most people go on dates with a more impressive purpose, and that is to find life mate. There are a hundred and one things that should match before two people decide to spend the rest of their lives with each other.
Many people are of the opinion that they do not need any help with dating. They may be right because no body knows a person’s tastes and likes better than the person himself or herself.
Maybe most of us do not need any help in making the right choice but isn’t it good to get a few pointers on the dating process as such, particularly on Online dating? It is with this objective that this matter was prepared so that the thousands who are now availing of Internet dating may get the best out of it.
What Makes Online Dating So Different?
We, human beings have been in this world for so many thousands of years. And since the beginning people have been choosing partners. Cultures across the world are very different and we can come across so many different ways in which people choose their life mates.
But the concept of finding a life partner with the help of the Internet is a fairly recent concept when compared with the history of mankind as such. Of course the Internet and computers have influenced man’s life so much that it is no surprise that in the matters of finding a suitable partner too, the Internet has made its presence felt.
Online dating is, to put is very simply or flatly, finding a partner with the help of a machine namely the computer via the Internet. That itself makes the idea and the process a very novel one indeed, Hundreds of happy people across the globe have been successful in finding suitable partners by the means of online dating.
But to be frank with you, a lot of not-so-lucky persons have been goofed and jilted by the same process. So in order to make sure that you find a place in the first list let us go into the details of Online dating.
The Magic of the Internet
Everything that applies to the Internet, applies to Online dating as well. The Internet as we know allows for unlimited possibilities in communication, and it is this feature that has proved to be at the same time the biggest boon, as well as bane for Online dating.
People can start from scratch and get to know everything about each other before the actual meeting takes place. Tastes and preferences, likes and dislikes, interests and obsessions can be discussed on a one to one basis so that when the meeting actually takes place these two people are not in the least strangers to each other. Wonderful, isn’t it?
But at the same time this possibility for unlimited communication leaves a lot of space for guile as well. The human race is endowed with a remarkable ability to use, misuse and abuse the same thing. And naturally, Online dating too has been and is still being used for vile purposes.
The person who is misusing this facility may either be a practical joker or may be someone with more devious intentions who is out to get some victims. It is because of this reason that a little bit of homework is good before you actually hit the road.
But you do not have to worry, the home work has already been painstakingly done for you and all you have to do is run your eyes along the following lines and you will be all set to strike gold.
How Did Online Dating Become So Popular?
The reason is pretty simple. It is very much the same reason that the Internet itself became so popular. The Internet opens up a whole new world of communication and contact. And the reasons for this are given below.
· Speed
Try to picture what used to happen earlier in the days when people had to depend on the good ol’ postal system. During those days, a person had to wait for one or two days for a letter to get across to a person who lived in the same state itself. The second person in turn would take one or two days to respond and this letter would take on or two days to get back to the first person.
So in effect, a single correspondence would stretch over a week. But now it’s a totally different story. The time taken for the first letter and the response has been brought to an amazing 2 minutes!
Waiting may make the heart grow fonder but e-mail makes two people get close faster!
· Privacy
The Internet provides for absolute privacy too. One can carry out communication with another person in the absolute privacy of one’s bedroom or bath room or wherever one chooses to be. There is no fear of eavesdropping (ugh) or over hearing (shudder!) thanks to e-mail and chat facilities.
· Options and Opportunities
The Internet provides for other options like voice chat or video conferencing and stops short only of the physical touch. But then who would want to start a relationship by touching right away?
You can see a person, talk to a person, and listen to the person’s voice, can you think of a better way to start a date?
· Economy
All this and more it is possible thanks to the Internet and the best part is that all this comes to you for peanuts. All you need is a PC (who doesn’t have one?) and an Internet Connection (how can anybody live without one?) and you are all set. The only thing more you could ask for is a step-by-step guide to find your dream date…well here it is!
So what are we waiting for?
Be Clear About What You Want
We all know that man is a social being. However man is also a lonely being. (And when we say man, we mean women too). Man longs for company.
Company not just from friends and the family, but from that special person with whom he or she can share those sweet nothings, those simple pleasures and pains, someone with whom he or she can build a whole new life, someone with whom he or she can raise a family of his or her own.
Now this is a fundamental need of man: to find a life mate. And the most popular method used for this is dating. When we talk about dating in the very finest sense of the word, please understand that dating is not to be viewed as a precursor for sleeping together. It is much more than that. It is the first step towards choosing a life partner and online dating has made the whole process a lot simpler now.
Marriage Versus A Casual Relationship
Now what you do and what you want is entirely your business. I don’t want to sound nosey but I would like to draw a fine line between the kind of dating that is involved in these two quests.
Of course we are all grown up and so let us act like grown ups. Obviously in a casual relationship we are looking for fun. And mind you, fun can have a lot of connotations. So here the object of one’s desire will obviously be a person who is not inclined towards a serious relationship.
If both parties are of the same view then it is well and good because they understand each other perfectly and do not expect much from such a relationship. This leaves no room for heartbreak.
It is when one party is in for something more serious and the other party is into sheer frivolousness that the problems start. So you should be absolutely clear about what you are looking for from the start, and you should make your intentions very clear to the other person.
At the same time you should have no doubts about the intentions of the other person as well. Remember, even if it is a casual relationship, there should be mutual understanding at least about the nature of the relationship.
Of course, there is yet another possibility where a casual relationship can blossom into something more serious. But, again in such cases it is your instincts that can help you identify what is good and what is bad.
No matter how strong a person is, anyone can be taken for a ride or be taken for granted. Being jilted is never a nice experience. So those of you who are going in for a casual relationship, for heavens sake, be on your guard! Marriage is altogether a different story but we will deal with that later.
Dating Comes From a Fundamental Need
Let’s face it, of course sex is important, but sex is by far NOT the most important reason for dating.
Important! Maybe during the age of thoughtless youth, when new hormones are being pumped in and out, sex is on every one’s mind. But as one matures (mind you that does not mean growing old and gray) sex takes the back seat and mutual support, likes and dislikes, cooperation, caring and sharing come to the forefront. We start thinking about building up a world of our own and we need someone to share it with, and not just someone to sleep with.
Sex is a fundamental need of every human being. We all have it in us to give and receive physical pleasure. But when you sit and think about it for a minute, you can see that this urge is actually the result of another urge.
There is a more primary urge in every human being to breed and produce offspring, and it is this urge that gives rise to such a powerful sexual desire. But whatever be the urge, the most dignified means to satisfy it is dating.
Nobody, not one of us, is complete without a partner; and it is to satisfy this need that people date. Because of this, the rest of this manual will be dedicated not to finding the right sex partner, but to finding the right life partner.
Online Dating Is Here To Stay
Let’s accept the fact that dating couldn’t really get better. Online dating is THE real thing. Let’s compare it to the old system of evening balls or social gatherings. Imagine you are this big gathering where there are a lot of men and women looking out for suitable partners.
Suppose you bump into one or two people with whom you seem to strike an immediate rapport. You are then able to take this person out onto a balcony with just the moon to keep an eye on you.
You get to talk to this person for hours and hours; just talk and nothing else. You get to discuss likes and dislikes and finally when it is time to part you leave with a promise to meet on a following day at an equally enjoyable spot. These talks go on for days and weeks and finally you decide that this indeed is the THE person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life with.
Then of course you start meeting in more open places, you hold hands and even kiss. You begin to go out for lunch and dinner and spend even more intimate time together. When the moment is right and your decision is made, it then becomes time for you to say, “I do.”
Sigh! It sounds like a nice fairy tale, doesn’t it?
Well it needn’t be. It could be your own love story because the concept of online dating is just what has been described above. If you click the right buttons everything could work out fine for you and we have evidence to prove it. Just take a look at the figures given below and you can behold for yourself what a universal phenomenon online dating has already become.
As I mentioned earlier, one of the best things about online dating is that it affords a lot of privacy. You can chat for hours, video conference, or do whatever it is you care to do without arousing the interest of others or attracting the wrong kind of attention. All you need is a computer and Internet access everything becomes as discreet as can be. But along with that, may I add that we need a little bit of common sense as well or else we might find ourselves within the clutches of many lurid monsters lurking out there.
Another good thing about online dating is that it saves a lot of money which otherwise you would have had to splurge each time you took someone out on a date. It is because of these reasons and many more personal reasons that thousands of people find online dating to be a great convenience.
How To Get The Most Out Of Online Dating
Many people who decide to give online dating a try often end up with their hair singed and fingers burnt.
The reason we decided to put together such a manual is that online dating is not as simple as it looks. You need to know how to go about it in order to get the best out of it. Most people do not like to take chances and when it comes to finding a life partner people do not want to take chances at all.
But you can relax for through this manual we will be dealing with all the do’s and the don’ts and so the whole process will be quite easy and enjoyable to you. This manual will provide you with step-by-step instructions on how to being online dating.
We have no doubts about the decision-making abilities of our readers and so we do not propose to give a lot of advice on the issue. Our purpose is simply to provide a couple of guidelines which we hope our readers will find valuable as they proceed in the attempt to find the perfect partner.
